Douglas Adams’ thank-you note in response to receiving a copy of the UCIttHHGttG at his first lecture in Göttingen. Photo © Mathias Maul.
The Ultra-Complete Index to Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency
After the sweeping successnerdy self-congratulations and quite a bit of positive feedback from fellow fanatics in response to the Ultra-Complete Index to the Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Jonathan Woithe (then at University of Adalaide) asked me if we could collaborate on an index for the Dirk Gently books. We did, and this was the result. Thanks again, Jon!
1994-09-06
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
This work is licensed under the GFDL, the GNU Free Documentation License.
You can obtain a copy of this license at http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/
Copyright (c) Mathias Maul (mm@redacted) and Jonathan
Woithe (jwoithe@redacted).
Permission is granted to copy, distribute and/or modify this document under
the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License, Version 1.2 or any later
version published by the Free Software Foundation; with Invariant Sections,
no Front-Cover Texts, and no Back-Cover Texts, with the Invariant Sections
being all sections except the actual index entries. --Mathias, Oct 25 2004.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Many people asked me whether I 'ripped' this index from electronic
versions of the books. The answer is simple: I did not. Please do not ask
this question again. --Mathias, September 24 2004.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Nearly all of my addresses mentioned below have now been invalid for
quite some time. At the moment, the safest way to reach me is by sending
mail to mmaul@redacted. --Mathias, May 20 1999.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Preface
"I'm alone," he said, "utterly alone, lost again. If only I
had a way to -" - "Don't Panic," a strangely familiar voice
remarked, "you brought It here, didn't you?" - "Well yes,
but -" - "Good. Just look it up." - "But this is another
story, another universe. This is not the Hitch Hiker's Guide
to the Galaxy!" - "Just look it up, go ahead."
He did. This is what he read:
Kent, ecclesiastical architecture of I:14/94.
He sighed with relief. He had not thought that it could be
so simple. "Finally," he thought, "there's an Index to Dirk
Gently's Holistic Detective Agency."
The Ultra-Complete Index to Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency
compiled and copyrighted 1994 by Mathias Maul and Jonathan Woithe
===========================================================================
second public release as of 6-sep-1994
You all knew that it simply had to happen sometime, didn't you? You
all knew that, exactly at the moment when most people had taken the
existence of The Ultra-Complete Index to the Hitch Hiker's Guide to the
Galaxy for granted, another Index would spring up, enlightening your
otherwise quite dull lives once again, didn't you? You knew all that,
right?
Well, I didn't. Some weeks after the publication of The
Ultra-Complete Index to the Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy lots of
people (well, about half a dozen) asked me to make up an Index of the Dirk
Gently novels, and I've told most of them that I'm busy with school and
all and that the Index will surely come but only after finishing some
other stuff. (Which, by the way, is still in the works. Well, sort of.)
What I'm trying to say is this: The idea of the Dirk Gently Index
constantly lurked somewhere in quite obscure and mostly uncharted parts of
my brain, only waiting to leap back into consciousness when Jonathan
Woithe, a hoopy frood whom I've been in conversation with for quite a
while, mailed me a list with just slightly more than four hundred index
entries for Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency.
This was the subtle gust of air that got the stone rolling, this was
what started what precedes and follows this very sentence.
But, for the sake of brevity, I will not continue to write even more
of this. I just want to add that the entry format is exactly the same as
in The Ultra-Complete Index to the Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, i.e.
Frobniz I:42/21,23. II:17/21;23/69.
means that the word "Frobniz" can be found in volume one (i.e. DGHDA) in
chapter 42 on pages 21 and 23 and in volume two (i.e. TLDTTOTS) in chapter
17 on page 21 and chapter 23, page 69. I know that the Dirk Gently novels
are not related to each other to such an extent as are the Hitch Hiker's
Guide books, but there are quite a lot of references and there might be
even more in the book(s) to follow The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul. Ah
yes, the page numbers given refer to the English Pan Books paperback
editions of 1988 and 1989, ISBN 0-330-30162-4 and 0-330-30955-2
respectively.
For further enlightenment please consult the Ultra-Complete Index to
the Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, most probably available at a site
near you. The current release of both the Index to the Guide and this
document can be obtained via anonymous ftp at vela.acs.oakland.edu
(141.210.10.2), via FTS-FRequest at 2:2461/161 or via Mail. Feel free to
ask me for details.
Acknowledgements
----------------
This document is, strictly speaking, a co-effort of Jonathan Woithe
(jwoithe@redacted) and myself. He not only started the
whole thing off but also kept it rolling. The introduction is my work, as
is about half of the entries.
Furthermore, I'd like to thank Klaus "Fozzy" Nitsche (who still is a
sysop) for his efforts to exterminate even the tiniest mistakes and typos,
Thomas Schaefer (ts@redacted) for acting as human gateway
between me and the UseNet newsgroup alt.fan.douglas-adams,
Siegfried Lenz (SLENZ@redacted), who (up to now) was the
only person to do what I asked the readers of the Index to the Guide, he
sent me a copy of Plundered Hearts, one of the not-so-classic but
nevertheless quite-hard-to-find Infocom games and made me very, very happy
indeed,
all the people who distributed the UCIttHHGttG to the remotest parts
of our planet, especially Nathan Hughes (nhughes@redacted),
who weaved the Index into the World Wide Web (check out his homepage at
http://www.umd.umich.edu/~nhughes/dna) and Steve Baker
(swbaker@redacted), who maintains the PGG archives at
vela.acs.oakland.edu,
and of course Douglas Adams for writing some of the best books I've
ever read.
Again, if you feel like mailing me anything - be it greeting cards,
anything connected with Infocom, or anything else you think might please
me (signed books or such *g*), don't hesitate to do so. In return, you
will (depending, of course, on the - idealistic or material - value of
your donation) receive a printed and bound version of this document,
together with a disk with an incredibly beautiful and well-designed label.
If you want to contact me, try one of the following:
Mathias Maul InterNet: mathias_maul@(redacted)
(redacted) matt@(redacted)
(redacted) MausNet: Mathias Maul @ WI2
Germany
tel (redacted)
If email doesn't work, first look out for the latest version of this
document and compare the addresses, they might have changed. If all else
fails, use SnailMail (or, if you can afford it, just phone me).
So there. The Index will start right after the next full stop.
01-354 9112 I:16/111.
1 hour I:35/241.
10 II:14/126.
100% II:30/230.
1066 I:27/201.
11 o'clock II:3/19.
11.30 II:3/28.
11.35 II:4/30.
11.45 I:14/87.
117 dead II:2/11.
12 noon II:4/30.
12th century I:25/185.
130 II:2/11.
13/14 years II:6/49.
13-amp plug I:14/101.
13-tooth gristle saw and tig-welded rivets,
knife with built-in II:10/76.
15% II:10/85.
1.5, beta-test version I:8/56.
150 pounds I:16/119.
1500 pounds I:16/119.
15.37 flight to Oslo II:6/55.
1676 I:29/214.
16K I:4/18.
17 I:14/100.
17 miles II:12/118.
17, normal primes of I:2/5.
17, number I:14/100.
17 seconds I:8/53.
17 years I:4/16.
17 years, 3 months, 2 days, 5 hours, 19 minutes,
20 seconds I:10/70.
1.8 seconds II:5/38.
19 I:16/117.
19, normal primes of I:2/5.
1934 I:8/53.
1970s, late II:17/148.
1977 I:4/19.
1983 I:4/16.
1986 II:7/60.
20% II:5/40.
20 minutes I:22/170.
20 pence II:4/32.
20 pounds II:10/77.
2.00, version I:7/49;8/56.
200 (years old) I:4/28;27/199.
23, normal primes of I:2/5.
24 hours I:2/4.
24-hour filling station II:25/193.
25 pounds II:14/133.
250000 pounds II:3/27.
26.432, cosine of I:24/183.
27 II:14/126.
3 I:2/6.
3 days II:4/33.
3 min 25 seconds I:21/164.
30 seconds I:21/167.
300 pounds II:4/30;5/37.
327.50 pounds I:16/119.
33a, number I:16/111.
3.4874145 II:10/77.
35% I:2/5.
37 II:7/64.
37, number I:16/112.
3x4x5 I:19/145.
4 billion I:31/223;33/230;34/238.
4 days II:4/33.
4 o'clock I:15/105.
43 I:2/6.
45, number I:16/112.
47 dead, 89 injured II:2/11.
5 II:10/85.
5 hours II:3/28.
5 years II:11/102.
500000 II:6/45.
517 subclauses II:30/230.
539.7, square root of I:24/183.
541 something II:11/101.
598703 I:2/6.
6 years I:4/26.
63 dead, 130 injured II:2/11.
6.30 II:4/30.
67% II:4/31.
7 (memory registers) II:1/5.
7 years I:4/26.
73 bus II:6/56.
8.30 I:16/116.
8.46 I:21/167.
8.47 I:7/48;21/163.
89 II:2/11.
89% II:4/31.
9 o'clock II:3/20.
'A Suffusion of Yellow' II:10/77.
abacus I:8/52;25/189;27/200.
abacus, electric I:4/19.
abuse II:31/237.
accident, undoing I:34/238.
'Act of God' II:2/16;6/55;17/150.
Acton II:15/136.
adrenaline, hanging around your body turning sour I:12/80.
advertisement, Dirk's in the Yellow Pages I:16/111.
Aegean I:4/25.
aerosol II:11/113.
Air Force I:8/56.
airlocks I:8/51.
airport II:1/1x;14/127.
Albanian electricity II:11/105;18/154.
albatross I:35/242.
algae, recycled I:14/93.
alien invasions II:17/149.
almonds, oil of II:20/162;25/198.
Aloe Lip Preserver II:20/163.
Alph I:6/36.
alphabet II:23/180.
alternator, rumpus in II:15/135.
Amadeus, Wolfgang II:11/107.
America, cost of II:30/231.
American Express II:3/21;17/150;21/165.
American Hot II:8/66.
America's Cup 1983 I:4/16.
amoebic dysentery I:14/92.
Anatidae, small aquatic bird of the family I:30/216.
anchovy I:16/120.
anemones, bunch of I:20/155.
Anglepoise lamp I:21/166.
Angst I:4/15.
Anselm, Kate I:7/46;16/110x.
Anstey, Geoffrey II:4/31;6/46;21/172;
23/182.
answering machine, industrial-grade I:4/22.
answering machine, Kate's II:8/66;21/172;27/214.
answering machine, Richard's I:21/166.
answering machine, Susan's I:3/8;14/91;30/218;
32/227.
'Anthem' I:4/23x;7/48.
antique shops I:16/111.
antique (various) II:25/193.
antiseptic, bottle of II:20/162.
apathy, rampant II:13/123.
Apple Macintosh I:4/23.
apricot, oil of the kernel of II:20/162;25/198.
archaeologist, aged I:4/27.
Aries Rising Record Group II:14/131;23/181.
Arkansas II:19/159.
Arlott, Wesley II:19/159.
'Armed Response' I:7/49.
armpit, vacuum cleaner's II:8/65.
ARRGH! II:6/46;14/131;23/181.
artificial intelligence I:16/110.
'as pretty as an airport' II:1/1.
Asgard II:22/177;27/214.
Asgard, Gods of II:7/62;9/74;18/153;
22/176.
Assisi, St Francis of II:13/122.
asteroid I:35/242.
Atlantic ocean II:9/72.
atmosphere, a nasty I:34/236.
Aunt, Marquess of Queensbury's I:7/47.
aunt, old maiden I:20/155.
aurora borealis II:1/2.
automatic writing I:6/41.
'Autopilot' II:6/49.
axe, heavy short-handled II:28/218.
A-Z street map of London I:13/85.
Bach, Johannes Sebastian I:36/245.
Bahamas, expensive expenses in I:16/118.
Bailey, Sister II:7/61;32/239;34/244.
Baker, Ginger I:21/160.
baklavas I:18/137.
ball, flying I:19/145.
banana, bowl with single II:2/14,16.
bank manager I:23/171.
Barcelona chairs II:11/92.
basement II:5/35.
BASIC I:4/20.
bass rendition II:22/176,178.
Bates II:4/31.
bath, Edwardian type II:8/67x.
bathroom, Reg's I:8/61x.
'bathroom', the word I:17/129.
baths, things for putting in II:8/67x;20/163.
battleaxe, exquisitely crafted beautifully
balanced I:14/98.
BBC I:4/18;11/102. II:11/102.
beak, the eagle's II:21/164.
Beatles of the early eighties I:4/20.
Beatles songs I:8/61.
bedside lamp, small I:6/38.
'beep' I:7/48;9/68;12/76;14/88.
Beeswax, Honeyed II:20/163.
Beethoven II:11/106.
beetle, peculiar form of flying I:17/128.
behaviour, of eagle II:21/171.
belief systems I:17/127.
Bell, Howard II:10/89;14/126,129x;
23/181;35/246.
Bennett, Mrs I:15/103.
Benson, Mrs II:11/91.
bentwood chair II:5/38.
Bermuda I:20/154;34/236.
Bermuda triangle industry II:27/213.
Bernice I:16/123.
'besieging' II:10/80.
beta testing I:7/49.
Beverly Hills I:7/49.
'Beware! Beware! His flashing eyes, his
floating hair!' I:14/87.
Big Bob the Finder II:5/35.
bills I:16/115. II:3/27;
10/85,88;27/212.
bills, layout of II:27/211.
bing, boxes that go I:7/46.
binoculars, pair of I:13/84.
bird, homicidal II:25/195.
bird, large cross I:29/213.
Birdwing Butterfly, Queen Alexandra I:4/11.
Birmingham I:4/26.
Bishop's Stortford I:26/195.
bitter orange blossom, infusion of II:20/162;25/198.
Black Maria I:6/43;16/115.
blame II:5/41,42.
Blenheim Palace I:29/212.
blitz II:25/193.
Bloddy Tears, Streams Of II:10/81.
'Blood on the Tracks' II:5/36.
Bloody Mary II:14/127.
Blue Saver Day II:27/211.
Bluthall, Mrs I:16/116.
BMW II:12/116;19/158;31/235;
34/244.
BOAC posters I:16/112.
boar, roasting II:28/216.
Bob I:10/71.
'Bob's here' II:6/57.
bodily harm, grievous II:10/85.
body, Gordon's I:9/64;15/107.
Bogart voice, Fred's best I:10/71.
'Bolero' I:7/46.
bookshop I:16/111.
boot, figure jumping out of I:7/50.
Borley Rectory I:8/56.
box, large white metal II:33/242.
box, old pizza II:3/22.
boy, small I:18/137. II:6/49;35/245.
bra advertisement II:6/48.
bracelet, red II:5/43.
Brandenburg Concertos I:36/246.
breakfast I:16/108.
brick wall, lethal overdose of II:23/181.
brick, Wordsworth sick on I:4/14.
brickwork, nice I:4/11.
brilliantine II:10/78.
Bristol Channel I:35/240.
British Guiana I:29/212.
British Nuclear Fuels II:2/10.
British Rail II:25/194.
British Telecom I:34/238. II:5/36;11/100.
broom cupboard, holy I:17/128.
'brrrrrr' noises I:4/10.
brusqueness and impatience, large quantities of II:11/104.
bug-eyedness II:14/127.
Bugs Bunny II:6/48.
Bulgaria II:11/105.
buns, crummy II:17/151.
burr burr I:33/233.
business cards II:19/159x.
button, blue marked red II:10/80.
Buxtehude I:4/18;4/28.
'BYTE' magazines I:12/81.
cabin trunks II:2/11.
cabinet minister, junior II:2/10.
cacophony, majestic II:17/149.
Cagney, Jimmy I:10/71.
calamity, impending II:21/170.
calculator, I Ching II:10/76,77x.
calvaria tree I:29/210.
Cam, the River I:4/12;27/202.
Cambridge I:4/9;24/183.
Cambridge one-way system I:12/76.
Cambridge, starving at I:4/20.
Cambridgeshire Constabulary I:16/115;21/161.
Cambridgeshire land, four acres of dank I:15/102.
Camden Passage I:16/112;18/136.
II:21/168;25/193.
canal I:22/169.
capital letters I:5/32.
car, running into II:12/118;19/158.
carnage, good solid II:7/59.
carpet, beige II:11/96.
carrier, perfect I:29/215.
carrots I:4/21,24.
cars, German II:6/48.
cat, Kate's II:1/2;16/146.
catflap I:25/186;29/211.
cause and effect I:32/228.
Cawley I:4/14;27/202.
CBE I:7/49.
ceiling I:23/173.
cellist, professional I:8/54.
Cellnet I:21/167.
cello I:24/175;30/218;36/245.
central heating, shut down I:14/91.
cereal packs I:4/15.
cerebral cortex I:14/90.
Chad I:25/185.
Challenging Hour II:9/74;26/209;28/220.
Chapel Market II:25/193.
Charlton Place I:18/136.
Chat program, American II:11/101.
check-in desk II:1/4;32/238.
check-in girl II:1/7;4/33;32/238.
cheese, blue I:2/5.
Chelsea I:14/97;21/168.
cheques I:23/171. II:1/6.
cherrywood table, French II:16/145.
Chesterfield sofa I:21/167.
Chevrolet, great yellow II:1/5.
chicken sheds I:4/21.
chickens II:11/109;14/129;35/246x.
Chief Consultant Psychologist II:11/91.
child, seven-year old I:24/181;27/200.
china kitten II:11/92;22/177;32/239.
China Tea I:19/141.
Chou, Duke of II:10/77.
chow mein I:22/169.
Chronology, Regius Professorship of I:4/12.
Chronotis, Professor Urban I:4/11;25/186,190;29/211.
chun II:10/80.
CID I:18/138.
cigarettes, search for II:25/192.
circuits, illogic I:2/5.
circular markings, strange II:16/143;23/185.
Citroen 2CV, yellow battered II:11/90x;12/115;14/133.
Cjelli, Dirk I:4/29;6/37x;14/90;
16/115. II:3/20.
Cjelli, Svlad I:4/29;6/37x;14/90;
16/115;21/160. II:3/20.
clairvoyance I:16/124.
Cleopatra I:27/199.
'click' I:12/76;14/88.
client II:3/27,28;4/37.
Clouds, God of High Towering II:16/142.
clunk, good healthy I:7/48.
Coca-Cola vending machine II:2/17;9/71;10/88;
16/145;19/158;20/161;
32/238.
cod liver oil II:20/163.
coelacanth I:32/228;34/239.
coffee, taking of II:10/79,83.
coin, milled-edge I:25/186.
coincidences I:16/125;18/133.
II:15/137.
Coleridge Dinner I:4/14.
Coleridge, Samuel Taylor I:4/14;6/36;19/147;
25/186;31/223;35/241.
Coleridge's poems, anthology of I:16/112;19/147.
Collier Campbell covering II:16/145.
Collins Music Hall I:16/112.
Comdex I:12/78.
comedian, alternative I:16/123.
comfrey II:20/162.
commercial II:30/231.
computer, the time machine's I:27/200.
conjuring trick, explanation of I:25/192.
Connors, Jimmy II:24/189.
constabulary I:5/44.
continuum, the I:32/228.
contract II:4/33;5/42;6/46;19/158;
21/173;28/223x;32/238.
Cork Street art dealers I:19/144.
coroner II:5/44.
Cotswolds II:7/58;11/90;25/199.
cottage, Gordon's I:15/102x;21/163.
cowshed I:35/243.
cream paint II:9/69.
cream-painted pipes II:8/67.
creature, big stupid voilent II:33/241.
creature, goblin-like II:12/117.
creature, seven foot tall shaggy-haired with
huge green eyes and horns II:4/33.
creatures, purple multi-limbed I:5/31.
credit cards II:17/150.
Crippen, Dr I:18/133.
Crops, God of Growing II:16/142.
crystals, green II:8/67.
cucumber I:20/151.
Cucumber Cleansing Milk II:20/163.
Currents, God of Flowing II:16/142.
cyclists II:10/89.
Cynthia II:19/160.
daffodils I:19/146.
Daily Telegraph I:19/141.
Danton II:14/131.
Darjeeling I:8/57.
Day of Judgement II:17/149.
'dead as a dodo' I:36/247.
Dead March I:4/24.
dead pig wrestling technique II:28/219.
deep-searched I:21/159.
definitions II:11/103.
Dental Technicians I:16/110.
deodorant commercial I:22/169.
Department of Environment I:7/49.
departure lounges II:17/151.
desk accessories I:27/201.
desk, severely designed black-ash II:11/91.
Detective Agencies I:16/110.
devil-figure, green-eyed II:19/158.
Dextro-Saline II:2/12.
dictionary I:20/150;24/184.
Directory Enquiries I:16/109.
'Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency' I:16/111.
disappearing II:27/213.
diseases, particularly gifted II:11/94.
dishwashers I:2/3.
'Disque Bleu' I:16/118.
ditch, dead in a I:3/8;7/48;21/165.
ditch, muddy I:19/140.
dodo I:29/214;32/228;34/239.
Dog Breeders I:16/110.
dogs, stone figures of winged II:25/199.
dolmades I:18/135.
'Dominique, French lessons, 3me Floor' I:16/112.
'Don't bother' I:4/20.
'Don't pick it up, pick it up, pick i-' II:5/36;21/172.
Door, The I:5/32,34x.
door, white I:5/34;8/51;29/210;
33/230.
Dordogne II:13/121.
Doris II:11/107.
double bass II:14/128.
doubt I:5/30.
Dover sole, lightly grilled I:19/142.
Dow Jones I:8/56.
dragons, carved II:25/199.
drainpipe, climbing up I:13/84.
Draycott II:14/131;28/218.
Draycott, Clive II:19/160;27/213;28/218;
30/229.
Draycott, Cynthia II:19/160;27/213;28/218;
30/229.
dream, Michael's I:19/140.
drickle, dreary kind of I:34/235.
drift, ability to simply I:11/73.
driver II:13/120x.
drizzle, indeterminate light from north-east I:1/1;25/185.
drug abuse II:11/110.
Druidic commune I:26/197.
drum machine, old I:12/81.
Dry Cleaners I:16/110.
Dubcek, Danton, Heidegger, Draycott II:14/131.
Dubcek, Stan II:14/131;23/182.
dugong, startled II:5/37.
Duke of Chou II:10/77.
Duralex beaker I:8/61.
Duran Duran poster I:16/114.
dust, rubbing on face I:5/35.
dustbins, green rubber I:13/84.
Duty Free shops II:1/6.
Dylan albums II:5/36.
Dylan, Bob II:5/36.
dysentery, bout of amoebic I:14/92.
E flat, annoying I:30/218;32/227.
eagle II:2/18;6/56;10/89;
16/142;19/160;23/184;
32/238;35/245.
eagle, dealing with II:21/164x.
eagles, in Valhalla II:28/216.
Ealing II:15/136.
Earl Grey I:8/57.
earrings I:27/199.
East Anglia I:26/197. II:26/208.
Eastwood, Clint I:4/17.
'eek' II:11/90.
Einstein I:19/146. II:11/107.
elderberry tree II:11/108.
electric monk I:2/3,5;5/30;31/225;
32/227.
electricity, Albanian II:11/105;18/154.
Electricity Board I:16/120.
Elena II:3/23;23/180.
elephant I:20/150.
Eliot, George II:11/106.
elms, dead II:12/115.
Elwes, Mr II:11/101.
Emu I:21/160.
Emulator II+ HD I:12/81;21/160.
encyclopaedia, one volume II:22/174.
envelope II:6/47;10/86x;23/180.
error-checking protocol, quick-thinking I:17/127.
estate agents I:16/111. II:17/152;
21/165.
Europe II:1/3.
Euston Road II:17/148;25/199.
'Evening Standard' II:2/15.
Everything, Grand Unified Field Theory of II:11/107.
evidence, his share II:5/44.
exam questions I:6/39.
Excel spreadsheet I:12/81.
Exmoor I:35/240.
expenses I:16/118.
exploding, gas cooker I:15/107.
explosion II:2/11.
ex-secretary, Dirk's I:16/114;18/137;20/149;
23/171.
facts I:31/223.
fainting, of a ghost I:15/107.
faith I:2/4.
Falklands I:19/140.
farmer I:12/77.
fassolia plaki I:18/135.
Fate I:18/137.
'Fathom' I:14/93,99;19/144;34/237.
Faust II:21/173.
Fender Precision bass II:16/147.
Ferrari II:23/181.
ferry timetables, Greek I:4/25.
fig, large glazed I:20/152.
figure, large hairy green-eyed II:6/57.
filing cabinets II:11/92.
filling station, 24-hour II:25/193.
Finder, Big Bob the II:5/35.
Finn II:7/62.
fire I:17/128.
First Court I:4/9;25/186.
fix, dirty II:25/195.
fjords II:1/2.
'fling!' II:26/206.
floor II:2/14.
floor lamp, ugly Edwardian I:18/136.
floorboard, bits of II:15/140.
flooring, oak II:9/70.
flu, continental low-grade II:9/72.
folder, blue I:4/22.
foot, amputation I:25/185.
Ford Sierra II:13/121.
forest I:29/110.
Formica II:14/126.
Fosters I:15/106.
fourier analysis software I:21/159.
Fractal Landscapes I:14/93;19/144x.
Franco-Prussian war I:6/39.
Franklin, Alan II:11/93.
Fred I:10/71.
Frederick the Great I:4/13.
French, torrent of I:16/114,118.
fridge II:3/21;23/187;35/244.
fridge door I:21/165.
fridge, japanese microprocessor controlled II:10/81.
fridge, new II:4/33;21/168.
frogs II:23/187.
fruit flan, picture of II:6/48.
fruit, fresh II:7/61.
fruitbat, stuffed II:3/19.
fuel pump II:15/135.
'fundamentally fed up with being where it was' II:2/10.
G minor, most hideous cacaphony in I:12/82.
'Gaaarghhhh!' I:12/78.
garage II:14/125.
Gas Board II:2/10.
gas cooker I:15/106.
gasometers, five great II:27/211.
Gauloises II:3/21.
Gently, Dirk I:14/90;16/111;22/169.
II:3/20;23/180.
Gently, Svlad II:3/20.
Gentry I:16/109.
George III, King I:4/13;20/153;24/181;
25/193.
Germans, in yellow polo-shirts II:1/5.
'Geronimo' I:17/131.
'Ggggrrrraaaaaaaaah!!!!!!' II:29/225.
ghost I:30/216x.
ghost, story of the I:31/225.
giant, green-eyed hairy scythe-waving II:23/180.
giant, green-eyed scythe-bearing II:35/245.
giant, strange and violent green-eyed fur-clad II:5/40.
gift catalogues II:17/151.
Gilks, Sergeant I:18/139;21/161.
Gilks, Sgt II:5/37.
gin and tonic I:19/141.
girl, little I:4/17;20/152.
girls, jumping out of pie chart I:4/23.
'glance - pop' II:15/138.
glass, solid cubes of I:4/17.
Gluck I:4/18.
glue technology II:10/77.
GMT II:5/40.
gnats II:26/208.
goat, stuff about II:14/126.
goblin II:9/75;12/117.
God II:1/2;16/142.
God, act of II:2/16;6/55;17/150.
god, new II:33/242.
Gods of Asgard II:7/62;9/74;18/153;
22/176.
'Goetterdaemmerung' II:22/178.
goldfish I:4/17.
Grand Unified Field Theory of Everything II:11/107.
Grand Union Canal I:20/151.
grants I:14/90.
Grass, Blade Of Pushing Up Against Stone II:10/81.
gravity I:16/120;25/186.
Grecian urn I:19/146.
Greece I:4/25.
Greek islands, guide to I:8/57;25/189.
Greek restaurant I:18/135.
'Green Room Gossip' I:19/144.
Green-eye II:33/242.
greenness, sudden I:1/2.
Grey, Mrs II:16/146.
grins, repertoire of I:18/139.
grocery business, waking up in II:27/214.
'gross' II:11/103.
Guatemala II:1/5.
Guiana, British I:29/212.
Guilt God II:35/245.
guilt pressure I:12/80.
guilt, waves of I:18/134.
gunk, in bath II:8/68;20/163.
gunk, steaming II:6/50.
haiku II:11/110.
hair, limited I:8/60.
hair, metallic orange II:3/23.
half-nelson, logical I:4/18.
hamburger bars II:25/195.
hamburger salesmen II:25/194.
hard times II:28/222.
harpsicord, 18th century dual manual II:3/20.
Hastings, Battle of I:27/201.
hat, Dirk's I:6/37.
haze of light II:18/154.
Heathrow Airport II:1/4;6/55;17/151.
heavy breather, minimalist I:24/177.
Heidegger II:14/131.
Heisenberg II:11/107.
hell, pit of II:6/52.
hellhole, festering I:20/150.
helmet, great horned II:20/161.
help, non-existance offers of II:6/53.
Henry, Uncle II:11/107.
herb omelette II:10/78.
Hercules II:3/20.
'herring' I:20/150;24/184.
herring, pickled I:24/184.
hexagrams II:10/77.
hi-fi II:5/38.
High Table I:4/10.
Highbury Fields I:20/156.
Hillow II:18/154.
Himalayas, erosion patterns of I:7/49.
him-thing I:9/65.
hitch, trying to I:11/75.
Hoffman, Dustin II:11/102.
'holistic' I:16/115x,220.
Holmes, Sherlock, rejection of II:14/132.
Holy Family II:10/81.
Hoovered II:7/61.
Horne, Marilyn I:19/144.
horoscope, Dirk's II:4/32.
horoscope, Gordon's I:7/45.
horse, in the bathroom I:8/60,62;10/72;18/139;
21/161;28/206.
horse, surprised I:5/34.
horse, the Monk's I:2/3;8/60;10/72;17/130.
horse-riding ability, practical I:2/4.
horses I:2/4x.
hosepipe, green II:6/48.
'Hot Potato' II:6/45;21/172;23/182x.
house, Michael's I:19/142.
housebreaking, rules of I:14/89.
housewife, middle-aged II:11/106.
Hughes, Howard I:14/88.
human race, saving of I:35/242.
hunting scene, primitive I:5/31.
Hutch, Dennis II:14/130;23/181.
hypnotism I:18/133;20/149,153.
'I believe you' I:24/178.
I Ching calculator II:10/77x.
'I couldn't possibly that would be most kind' I:16/117.
iguana II:9/74.
illogic circuits I:2/4.
immortals II:22/175.
'impossible' I:20/150.
Indian Ocean I:29/212.
Indians, Red II:30/231.
Inland Revenue I:23/171.
instruction manuals I:2/5.
interconnectedness of all things, fundamental I:16/115x. II:4/30;
10/87x.
IOU II:4/32.
IRA II:2/10.
Islington I:16/111;20/152.
II:17/152.
Islington cafe II:10/78.
Islington Green I:16/112;18/135.
isolation tank I:16/110.
'It won't be long' I:8/61.
Italian suit, quiet II:19/159;27/213;28/218.
Jaguar, elderly II:4/29;12/118.
Jaguar, recovering II:15/136.
Jaguars, large I:16/112.
Japan II:10/77.
Japanese fish, pictures of I:18/136.
Japanese print II:21/168.
Jean-Philippe II:1/4.
jet fighter II:32/238;34/243.
jet, Phantom fighter II:9/71;32/238;34/244.
jogger I:20/151.
Jojoba Oil Cleanser II:20/163.
jokes II:11/108.
Judgement, Day of II:17/149.
Julia I:26/195.
jump, from window II:23/183.
Kawasaki II:17/149.
kazoo II:11/91.
Keats I:19/146.
kebab II:13/120.
keel, controversial I:4/16.
Kent, ecclesiastical architecture of I:14/94.
King Wen II:10/77.
King's Cross station II:25/193.
kitten, china II:11/92;22/177;32/239.
kittens, small II:21/167.
Kleenex I:16/113. II:14/133.
Klein, Calvin II:20/163.
knife with built-in 13-tooth gristle saw and
tig-welded rivets II:10/76.
Knowledge database I:12/82.
Korg DW8000 I:12/81.
'Kubla Khan' I:6/36;21/168.
'Kubla Khan,' second part of I:6/44.
lady, elderly I:20/151,152,155.
II:16/145.
lager commercial fees, vast I:16/123.
Lamarck I:16/121.
lamp, Michael's I:14/101.
Lapsang Souchong I:8/57.
last call, Gordon's I:32/229.
last message, Gordon's I:7/48;14/88;21/163.
'late night' II:25/192.
late night corner shop II:25/192.
laudanum I:19/147;31/223.
lavatories II:3/26.
lawyer II:13/119;19/158.
leakage, radioactive II:2/10.
Lear, Act 2, Scene 4 II:11/93.
leeches I:4/15.
lemon, hot I:29/214.
L'Esprit d'Escalier I:16/108;36/245.
'Let it be' I:8/61.
life insurance, advertisement for II:6/48.
life, music of I:33/233.
lifebelts I:20/152.
light, haze of II:18/154.
light, pale new I:1/2.
light, single dim red I:1/1;34/235.
lightning II:18/153.
Lightning, God of II:16/142.
'limbo' II:11/103.
linen II:7/62;18/155;30/231;
34/244.
lipgloss, corporate II:6/54.
liver and bacon II:4/31.
lobotomy, pre-frontal I:4/20.
London I:10/69. II:1/3.
London, A-Z street map of I:13/85.
London, B route to II:12/117.
London N1 I:16/111.
lorries, with 'Albania' stencilled on their sides II:11/105.
Los Angeles II:1/3.
lost, Dirk's reason for getting II:13/121.
lottery II:32/239.
Lotus I:7/46.
Louis XIV II:3/20.
LSD doughnuts I:26/197.
Lucifer II:6/51.
luggage II:1/1;2/11.
Luke II:1/3.
lunatics, passing II:14/131.
Lupton Road II:4/31;5/34x;21/173.
M4 II:1/2.
Mabel II:11/107.
MacDuff, Richard I:4/11;6/36;8/51;10/69;
12/76;15/105;16/108;
18/133;20/149.
Macintosh, Apple I:4/23.
Macintosh II I:8/56;12/81.
Madagascar I:29/212.
'Made in Birmingham' I:4/26.
Magic Circle I:25/191.
Magna House I:14/98.
Magna, Lady I:14/99.
Magna, Lord I:14/91,97x.
magnifying glass II:6/47;10/76.
magnifying glass, 25-diopter high-index
vacuum-deposited gold-coated II:10/76.
magnifying glasses, shops that sell II:10/76.
Malibu I:6/42.
man, big Nordic II:2/16.
Mander, Steve I:6/39.
manifolds II:15/135.
mantis, non-preying I:21/162.
Marbella II:5/44.
Margaux I:8/53;31/222.
Marines I:19/140.
markings, strange circular II:16/143;23/185.
Marks and Spencer charge card II:5/35.
'marmalade' I:20/150.
Marquess of Queensbury I:7/47.
Mars Bars, large half-full catering-size box of II:6/50.
Mason, Detective Inspector I:18/138.
maths professor I:4/18.
Mauritius I:29/212.
May, Elspeth II:11/105.
Mayhew, Miss II:11/94.
McKellar, Kenneth I:10/71.
memory, of college porters I:10/70.
Mephistopheles II:21/173.
Mercedes, silver-grey 500 SEC I:7/46;19/126.
Mercer, Roderick II:23/182.
'metal fatigue' II:2/10.
metronome I:18/134.
Michealmas II:3/21.
Michelangelo II:3/20;10/81.
Microsoft I:7/46.
Mid-Glamorgan II:22/175;32/240.
MIDI I:8/56.
Midland Grand Hotel II:27/214;31/235.
Mills, Sally II:10/84,88;14/125;
35/246.
mind, Dirk's I:21/165.
mirror, rear-view II:13/119.
Mjollnir, God of the Hammer II:16/142.
Moebius strip II:24/190.
molecule II:22/178.
molecule, behind II:6/57.
Monk, Electric I:2/3x,5x;31/225.
Monk Plus models I:2/5.
Monk shop I:2/5.
monoliths, concrete II:25/193.
monster, large hairy green-eyed II:5/42.
motherboard, whole new I:2/5.
motorcycle courier, early morning II:31/236;35/245.
Mount Abora I:6/41.
move, Dirk's next II:21/164.
movement, tiny sharp turning II:24/190;27/215.
Mozart I:14/96;24/176.
II:11/106.
muffin, old II:21/165.
multi-tasking Negative Capability I:2/5.
Mulville, Phil II:6/46;21/172.
murder, before lunch II:4/31.
murderers, statistics on II:4/31.
Murmansk airport II:1/1.
music II:5/35.
'Music and Fractal Landscapes' I:19/144x.
music, in the spaceship I:33/231.
music, listening to I:19/142.
napkins, red paper II:1/3.
navigation technique, Dirk's II:4/29x;13/121.
Nazi war criminal II:7/62.
Negative Capability feature, multi-tasking I:2/5.
Neighborhood Watch I:14/89.
Neil II:10/78;15/139x.
neroli oil II:20/163.
new god II:33/241.
New York II:1/3;17/149.
New York, crazies of II:17/149.
Newton, Sir Isaac I:19/146;25/186.
newts I:24/175.
NHS ward, short-staffed II:10/88.
Nicola I:14/96;30/217.
Ninja warrior, fit I:8/51.
nipple-pearcing I:4/14.
Noel Road I:30/219.
non-delivering pizza restaurants II:8/66.
non-fridge-opening II:3/24.
'non-linear catastrophic structural exasperation' II:2/10.
non-pizza-delivering world II:2/13.
North London II:3/19;21/166;34/244.
North Sea II:2/13;3/26;26/204;
32/239;34/244.
Northumbrian saints I:25/185.
Norway II:1/2;17/150;26/204.
nose, broken II:10/77,78,82,83x.
nose, damaged II:6/53.
November I:4/9.
Nuclear Fuels, British II:2/10.
nunnery I:4/14.
oaks, leafless II:12/115.
obituary, Gordon's I:11/74.
Observation Training I:21/163.
'Obsession' II:20/163.
Occam's razor II:11/97.
Octapad I:12/81.
'odd', meaning of I:7/47.
Odeon I:4/9.
Odin II:7/59;9/74;11/113;
18/153;26/209;28/220;
32/238;34/243.
Odwin, Mr II:7/58;11/113;14/127;
34/244.
'off' II:6/53.
office, Dirk's I:16/114.
'Oh ah' II:23/186;25/196;28/219.
'Oh, you take the high road and I'll take the
low road ...' I:10/71.
olive complexion II:7/63.
omelette II:4/31;10/78.
'on' II:6/53.
onx II:26/208.
'Opera' I:19/141.
orangeness, lingering I:1/2.
Oscar II:11/103.
Oslo II:1/4;6/55;13/122;
17/150.
Oslo, 15.37 flight to II:6/55.
'ouch' I:14/94.
owls, halting in mid-flight I:14/91.
Oxford Street II:6/46.
Oxfordshire II:3/25.
Pacific Ocean I:29/212.
Paignton, Colin II:6/46;21/172.
Pain II:6/46.
Pakistani, gentle-faced II:15/137.
paper clips, chain of I:4/15.
paradoxes I:32/228.
park, corner of II:8/66.
Parliament II:2/11.
Particles, God of II:16/142.
Patmos I:4/25.
Paxton, Nobby II:10/81;21/168.
Pearce, Janice I:16/114;20/149;23/171.
II:6/55.
Pearce, Jim II:4/33.
pebbles, Welsh II:22/178.
Peckender Street I:16/111,112x;32/226.
penguins II:2/11;12/118.
penguins, cabin trunks full of II:2/11.
penknives, shops that sell II:10/76.
Pentagon I:8/55.
Pentagon, incompetence and corruption in II:17/149.
Pentonville Road II:17/151;25/193.
pepperoni I:16/220.
Performer I:12/82.
person, non-large, non-blond II:11/99.
Personal Computer World I:16/118.
'Personal Computer World' I:16/118.
Peter Pan collar I:20/153.
Peugeot II:13/121.
PG Tips I:8/57.
Phantom fighter jet II:9/71.
Philips screwdriver, toothpick and ball-point
pen, knife with built-in II:10/76.
phone, push-button I:23/171;32/226,229.
physics, profound II:11/107.
piccolo II:14/128.
pick-up line, most wonderfully perfunctory II:14/133.
pickup truck II:15/136.
pie chart I:4/23.
piffle II:13/122.
pigs, roasting II:28/216.
pink, shade of pale I:2/4.
pinkness, horrible I:1/2.
pipes, cream-painted pipes II:8/67.
pizza I:2/4;35/242. II:1/3x;
8/65;17/152;35/246.
pizza boxes, old pile of II:21/168.
Pizza Express I:14/90,97.
pizza, Richard's I:16/120.
Planck I:16/117. II:11/107.
plaque, big brass I:16/112,114;23/171.
plastic, naff brown II:17/151.
Pleiades I:28/206.
PLO II:2/10.
pocket fluff I:16/115.
pocket television set II:6/57.
'points' II:11/103.
police I:22/170. II:3/27.
police car I:18/135,138;24/180.
police interviews I:7/47;12/79.
policeness of things II:5/43.
polo-shirts, inexplicable yellow II:1/5.
'pop', light bulbs going II:15/137.
Pope, the II:14/131.
porc au poivre I:4/23.
Porlock I:35/241.
Porsche I:8/55.
Porsche design sunglasses II:6/51.
porter I:10/70;25/185.
II:11/91.
possession I:28/207.
post-wedding reception party I:26/195.
pot, Greek I:4/26x.
Pot Noodles, large half-full catering-size box of II:6/50.
potato II:5/42.
potato, hot II:23/182;30/234.
prawn biryani II:4/31.
'Pray God I am not so soon!' II:4/29.
Premium Fonds II:3/27.
President of the United States II:11/103.
prices, stock-market II:11/97.
Primrose Hill I:18/136. II:8/66;15/136;
24/189.
Princes, Feudal II:10/81.
print, Japanese II:21/168.
private detectives, looks of I:16/109. II:10/87.
'profits' II:11/103.
programming, essence of I:4/20.
Prolog I:7/47.
promontory, rocky I:2/3.
property developers I:16/112.
Prophet VS I:12/81.
'psychosassic' I:6/38.
pub, English II:14/125x.
publishing magic II:14/130.
Pugilism and the Third Autistic Cuckoo II:6/46.
pupils, slow and dim-witted I:4/19.
quantum mechanical view I:16/117.
Quark II I:12/80.
Queensbury, Marquess of I:7/47.
questions, Parliamentry II:2/11.
quingigillion I:2/3.
rabbit, rampaging II:6/49.
rabbits I:7/49.
Radio Three, Head of I:4/17.
Raffaello Sanzio II:3/20.
Rag, Toe II:7/63;9/73;26/209;
29/225;30/230;33/242.
rage II:13/119.
rain forest I:29/210.
rain, gentle persistent I:29/210.
Rain, God of II:16/142.
rain, heavy slashing I:29/210.
rain, mean and wretched II:19/157.
Ralph I:26/195.
'Rap tap tap a rap tap a rap a tap' I:14/97.
Ravel I:7/46.
Rawlinson, Mrs I:16/115.
Reason I:8/55.
record turntable, Japanese II:5/44.
'Red', blue button marked II:10/80.
Red Indians II:30/231.
Reg I:4/11;25/186,190;29/211.
'Regard this simple salt cellar. Regard this
simple hat.' I:4/27;8/57.
religions II:1/5.
'Remember Wales' II:9/71.
removal, things at King's Cross II:25/194.
Renault, small blue II:21/165.
restaurant, Greek I:18/135.
retsina I:18/137.
Reunion I:29/212.
Revelation, Book of I:4/26.
reverse gear, long time since in II:12/117.
Rhassoul Mud II:20/163.
Rheinfahrt, Siegfried's II:22/178.
Rice Krispies II:21/165.
Rich Night Cream II:20/163.
road sweeper I:4/20.
Roberts, Bill I:10/71;25/185.
rock group I:4/20.
Roderick I:16/116;36/247.
Rodin I:23/173.
Rodney I:27/203.
Roland JX10 I:12/81.
roll-mop herrings I:24/177.
Ross, Al K. I:14/93,95;19/144;21/168;
34/237.
Rossettis I:19/144.
Rubik's cube I:8/53.
rugs, expensive Greek II:5/36.
rules of housebreaking I:14/89.
rum punches I:16/118.
'Run Like the Devil' II:10/89.
rushing around II:5/37.
Saab, black I:12/77.
Sabatier knives II:21/168.
sage II:20/162;25/198.
Saint John the Divine I:4/26.
salad eaters II:4/31.
Salaxala I:31/225.
salt cellar, heavy silver I:4/15,27;20/152;25/192.
Salt Lake City I:2/3.
San Francisco II:1/3.
Sancerre I:19/142.
Sanzio, Raffaello II:3/20.
Sarah I:4/17;20/152.
'Saul' I:4/24.
Sauskind, Mrs Joyce I:16/116;36/247.
sawdust, small sad pile of I:21/167.
Schechter, David II:14/130.
Schechter, Kate II:1/2;2/11;8/65;11/91;
26/201;29/225;32/237;
34/244.
Schleswig-Holstein I:6/39.
Scholarships, for gifted diseases II:11/94.
Schroedinger I:16/117,123.
Schroedinger's Cat I:16/121;24/183.
Schubert II:11/106.
scientists, white and fishlike I:4/13.
Scientologist I:24/180.
Scottish dagger feel I:25/188.
scuba-diving equipment I:30/217;34/236.
scythe II:4/33;5/40,42;6/57;
19/158;21/172;33/241.
seagulls, flock of I:4/23.
Seaweed and Birch Shampoo II:20/163.
Second Court I:4/9;8/51;25/186.
secret, Reg's I:25/193.
secretary, Dirk's II:3/25.
sedra, crushed leaves of II:20/162;25/198.
Sellotape II:6/47;10/77.
Senior Combination Room I:4/9.
Senseless Brutality I:21/163.
senses II:3/23.
Seoul II:1/5.
severed-head-removal activities II:5/41.
sex, quick II:25/195.
'sHades' II:6/51.
Shaping and Binding Forces, God of II:16/142.
sharp, big and I:14/92.
sheep, roasting II:28/216.
Sherlock Holmes I:20/153;24/181.
Sherlock Holmes principle II:14/132.
'shoot off' I:10/71;17/128.
shotgun I:7/49;9/64.
Siegfried II:22/178.
signpost I:12/76.
sillhouetted, dramatically II:6/50.
Silver Jubilee, Queen Victoria's I:27/199.
Simon I:30/218.
Sixth Avenue II:1/2.
Sixties ideals II:23/181.
skiing hat, red woolen I:4/9;27.
skin, the Monks' I:2/5.
sledge-hammer II:2/17;9/70;10/88;
16/144;24/189;29/226.
sleep II:7/59.
sleep of the just II:3/20.
slimy things with legs I:19/141;21/168;27/203;
28/208;34/237.
smells I:27/199.
Smith II:3/25.
Smith, Janice II:4/33;6/55;10/79;
32/238.
snooker player, nice juicy I:6/43.
sofa, Chesterfield I:21/167.
sofa, Kate's II:15/139;16/145.
sofa, Reg's I:8/52.
sofa, revolving I:7/49;12/81;21/159.
sofa, Richard's I:8/52;16/111;18/139;
20/153;21/158,167;36/245.
soft drinks, commercial for II:30/231.
Soho basement drinking club II:6/52.
solo, smoky saxaphone II:11/91.
'Something Nasty in the Woodshead' II:11/93;12/117.
something or other, profound sense of II:8/66.
songs, whale's II:17/151.
Sony tape recorder I:20/156.
'soulfully' II:10/80.
soundtrack editors II:11/91.
soup, spilling of I:4/18.
South Amerika II:1/3.
South Hackney I:20/152.
South Korea II:10/77.
souvlaki I:18/135.
Soviet Union, head of the II:11/103.
spaceship I:31/225;33/230x.
spatial geometricians I:8/53.
speaker grilles, fine-meshed matte-black I:7/46.
spoon I:18/138.
spreadsheet I:4/23.
squirrels, elderly I:4/9.
St Cedd's college I:4/9;25/185.
St Pancras Station II:25/199;31/235.
St Pancras Street II:25/199;31/236.
St Paul's I:12/81. II:24/190.
Standish, Ralph II:11/91.
Star Wars project I:8/55.
starlings, family of II:15/135.
statistics II:4/30.
sticker, small neat II:2/17.
stifado I:18/135.
stock cube, perfectly normal II:6/55.
stock market prices, girl reciting yesterday's II:11/97.
stones, counting of II:22/175;28/221;32/240.
storms I:1/1;34/235.
street lamps II:15/137.
subconscious, Dirk's II:17/148.
submarine, solar-powered I:11/74.
subtotal, tricky II:30/234.
Suez crisis I:6/37.
suicides, smart-alec show-off II:5/39,43.
suit, quiet Italian II:19/159;27/213;28/218.
sun II:3/19.
Sunderland, Mrs I:16/114.
sundial II:5/40.
suntan I:25/193;28/206.
superglue II:9/69.
Susan, at the office I:7/49;14/91.
Sutherland, John I:19/144.
swallows, facts about I:12/82.
swan, small rubber I:4/15.
swimming I:20/155.
Synth-Axe MIDI guitar controller, left-handed I:12/81.
system error, sheer blank I:5/34.
S-Z phone book I:16/109.
table, cherrywood farmhouse II:5/43.
table, hermaphrodite I:2/5;5/31.
table lamp, blue china II:22/176;32/239.
tableleg, interrogating II:10/87.
talons II:21/169;23/184.
tan 74 II:10/77.
Tangiers Club I:3/8.
tape, from answering machine I:21/162,165.
tape recorder, Sony I:20/156.
taxi I:24/175.
tea, cup of II:23/186.
Telecom Tower II:24/190.
telephone directory, film rights for I:16/111.
telephone, Reg's I:8/63;10/70;27/201;
34/238.
telephone system, British I:27/201;32/227;34/238.
television II:5/41;6/48.
television advertisements II:9/72.
Tenerife II:1/2.
tequila II:23/181.
Terminal Two II:1/4;2/11;6/55;17/151.
'The Gods are walking the Earth!' II:17/149.
'The Guardian' I:16/118.
'The New Yorker' I:19/141.
The Reasonable Good Band I:4/20.
'The Ride of the Valkyries' II:16/147.
'The Rime of the Ancient Mariner' I:19/147;31/223.
'The terror of the Earth' II:11/93.
things not to think about, list of II:1/5.
things, slimy with legs I:19/141;21/168;27/203;
28/208;34/237.
Thinker, The I:23/173.
'This way for Norway' II:1/5.
Thor II:7/60x;16/142x;17/150.
'Three Blind Mice' I:4/21;19/146.
thrush, dead I:25/192.
Thunder, God of II:16/142.
'thunderbolt' II:12/118.
Thursday I:3/8;21/162. II:3/25.
Tiddles, Miss I:16/116.
time machine I:25/194;27/200;29/210;
30/217;36/247.
time, seriously passing I:1/2;3/7.
time-engineering I:28/206.
Times Literary Supplement I:19/141.
'Times Literary Supplement' I:19/141.
time-travel applications, user-friendly I:27/201.
toccata I:4/28.
Toe Rag II:7/63;9/73;26/209;
29/225;30/230;33/242.
tomb, brisk as II:3/25.
'too much Mozart' I:4/17.
tooth rot for kids II:30/231.
tornado, podgy I:24/180.
towel II:12/118.
towel, large I:20/155.
tower, blackened stump of a I:1/1;34/235.
towers, ugly II:24/189.
trade mark, instant II:14/130.
traffic jam II:17/148x.
tramp II:23/186;25/196;28/219.
tramps, in station, disappearing II:25/198,200.
Transylvania I:6/38.
trigonometry I:18/133.
trust, simple Electric I:2/6.
Tsuliwaensis II:26/205;29/228.
Tuckett I:21/164.
Tuesday II:13/122.
Tuesday afternoons I:21/163.
tunic, well-pressed loose green II:7/60.
turkey and ham sandwich munchers II:4/31.
turn, three point II:12/117.
twigs, believing in I:17/128.
TX modules I:12/81.
United States, President of the II:11/103.
Universe, creation of II:1/2.
Universe, the I:32/228.
Upper Street I:14/90;16/111.
II:25/193.
Ursa Minor II:1/1.
US Navy I:8/56.
Utah I:2/3.
V sign I:11/75.
vacuum cleaner's armpit II:8/65.
Valhalla II:18/153;24/191;27/214;
28/216x;33/241.
valley, pink I:2/3;5/31.
vampire bat, psychic mystic telephathic fey
clairvoyant psychosassic I:6/38.
van, grey Mercedes II:11/105x;12/115;17/148;
18/154;25/199.
Vaseline I:34/236.
vending machine, Coca-Cola II:2/17;9/71;10/88;
16/145;19/158;20/161;
32/238.
'Vengeance' II:20/163.
Victoria, Queen I:27/199.
Victorian Gothic I:15/102.
video recorder I:2/3;27/201.
Vitamin B II:8/67.
Vitamin B12 II:8/67.
Vitamin B13 II:8/67.
Vitamin E II:20/163.
Vivaldi I:14/96.
Vivaldi wind concertos I:19/142.
Viyella, striped II:7/60.
Volvo, small II:21/165.
voodoo lawyer II:30/233.
W. H. Smith II:25/195.
Wagner II:16/146.
waiter, attracting attention of II:10/84.
Waitwright's Fruit Emporium I:20/151.
Wales II:9/71;22/174x;26/209;
28/221;32/240.
walls, walking through I:15/102.
Wapping, slavering hacks of II:12/117.
warehouse, derelict II:9/69x.
Warp And Woof, Threads Of The II:10/81.
wasp II:11/113.
wastepaper bin, telephone in I:16/120;21/160.
Watkin I:4/17.
wave patterns I:31/224.
Way, Gordon I:4/24;7/45;12/78;14/99;
21/162;30/219.
Way, Susan I:3/7;8/54;14/92;22/169;
33/234.
Way, The I:5/32.
WayForward Technologies I:4/22;7/46.
WayForward Technologies II I:7/46.
weather forecast I:7/45.
Welsh pebbles II:22/178.
Wen, judgement of King II:10/81.
Wen, King II:10/77.
Wenton-Weakes, Michael I:14/91,97x;19/140;
21/168;26/196;30/217;
31/221.
Wenton-Weakes, Peter I:19/140.
West End II:8/66.
Westway flyover II:15/136.
whales' songs II:17/151.
(wham) II:5/41.
whamming II:5/41.
what's-all-thising II:3/22.
whatsisname II:5/37.
wheel, own expedition II:12/116.
'Whhfff...fffmmm...nnggh!' II:6/53.
'whoosh, thud!' II:21/169.
'Why did the chicken cross the road?' II:11/110.
Wigmore I:14/96.
wildlife, local II:13/124.
Wilton I:19/142.
Wind, God of II:16/142.
window, in relation to II:11/99.
window, punching through I:14/101.
Windsor Great Park I:4/13.
wing mirrors, digital heated servo-assisted
computer-controlled breath-resistant I:9/66.
Winnipeg I:20/155.
witnesses, no I:1/2.
witnesses, several hundred I:21/167.
Wodin II:7/58;34/244.
woman-in-cocktail-dress-framed-in-the-sights-
of-a-gun II:10/89.
'Woodshead' II:8/68.
Woodshead Hospital II:7/58;11/93x;30/231.
words, torrent of II:5/35.
Wordsworth I:4/14.
workroom, Richard's I:12/81.
World Reporter database I:12/82.
worlds, all of them II:22/177.
worry beads I:30/216.
wreckage I:21/167.
writing desk, Georgian I:28/205.
Xanadu I:6/36.
yacht navigation consultant II:19/159.
Yale lock I:8/51.
yellow, suffusion of II:10/77.
York Way II:25/194.
'You better believe it, buddy' I:10/71.
'You-know-who' II:9/71.
Yugoslavia II:11/105.
Zaganza, the Great II:4/32;10/84;35/246.
Zbigniew I:16/111.
Zen navigation II:4/29x.
There you are. Again, comments are welcome. You'll find my addresses
somewhere in this document.
===========================================================================
Disclaimer
This is your usual disclaimer, disclaiming the usual things
disclaimers usually do. Essentially, nobody save the author of this text
may alter it in any way and those who do are sure to be tortured in the
most horrible ways - deprivation of Net access or things like that.
Anyway, verbatim copies of this document may be distributed via
noncommercial channels as long as no fee of any kind is charged for it.
Void where prohibited, batteries not included, fully tax deductible unless
stated otherwise on the back of this page, your mileage may vary. Watch
out, guys.
===========================================================================
"Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency" and "The Long Dark Tea-Time of
the Soul" are, as are many other great works of our century, copyrighted
by Douglas Adams.
"Plundered Hearts" is - at the moment - a trademark held by Mediagenic.
I'd like to point out again my deep respect to all the great people who
worked (well, sort of) at Infocom.
There are some other trademarks mentioned in this document, but there you
are.
-eof-